Hi guys! I know it’s been a long time; my dad never misses a chance to remind me. Life around here has been hectic lately, and I really don’t think I have anything to write about anyway, but he doesn’t buy it.

Hmmm…What can I talk about?

We (okay, I mean my dad) went out and bought our Christmas tree last Saturday. Tonight it was finally put in it’s stand. We probably won’t decorate it for another week or so. Poor thing, it must feel neglected. I’m sure the tree-huggers will be after us soon.

So, I’ve been doing some Christmas shopping recently, and I’m very proud of myself. My favorite store this year for gifts is the Bibelot Shop, which is actually just across the street and half a block from Keegan’s. By the way, I will be at Keegan’s this Thursday, because I know that all of you have missed me so much.

And in other news, I have temporarily put the wrist sweaters away because of extremely freezing temperatures. Yes, that’s right. All you wristsweataphobes can breathe easy. Now I have real mittens, the kind where the top flips up and velcroes to the back so fingers are free! Yay!

See you at Keegan’s!

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If you know anything about my family, you know that male-famale ratio is pretty low. As in one to four. Well, if you include the animals, its three to five, but we don’t. What I’m saying is that it’s usually pretty estrogenetic around here. (Did I just make up a new word?)

So on Sunday Benny and one of my Poppi’s old buddies came over to do manly things like hang out in the scary basement to watch the Vikings-Packers game and eat chili spicy enough to make them have to blow their noses every 4 and a half minutes. (After the kleenex were all used up there were brownies, but that’s not too manly, so don’t tell.) I know because I hung out in the scary basement, too; eating the spicy chili (though my nose didn’t run) and dozing through the football game. It was hard sometimes, though, because of the yelling. Packer fans can be rather boisterous. And so help me, Ben, if you throw that pillow at me again I’ll defenestrate you.

After a while, I felt like I was being resented. My dad told me I was cramping their style, and that if I wasn’t down there, they’d be lighting farts and whatnot. I told them that if they wanted me to leave, to just say so; but then I was begged to stay. I guess I’m not the only one that feels that fart-lighting isn’t manly, it’s just gross.

After that, there was dance-dancing, where I was almost taken out by a stray flying fist; and then “V for Vendetta”. The movie was interesting, I’ll give it that.

Whooaaa…too much testosterone! It’s going to take the four of us women several chick-flicks to get the basement back to normal. Where’s my “You’ve Got Mail”?

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Thursday night I came home from work, and the house was quiet. Bonita was talking on the phone in the living room, and I heard a ticka-ticka coming from the basement which meant my dad was blogging.

I found a cup of coffee sitting on the counter, getting cold.
I yelled downstairs, “Dad! Did mom make you some coffee?”
“Oh, dang it! I forgot about that.”
He came upstairs and I asked him where Tiger Lilly was.
“Oh, dang it! I forgot to pick her up from tae kwon do!”

You know, sometimes I think he just gets lost in his own little world. One of these days I’m going to ask him where his pants are just to see if he says “Oh, dang it! I forgot!”

Yes, yes, it all seems very funny right now, but what if he forgets something really important? Like my birthday? Yeah, I know, as if I’d ever let anyone forget that. But what if?

…

Anyway,last night I decided to watch one of my favorite movies (Elf). So I got all comfy in my pajamas and settled down in the basement with my sister and my cat when my friend calls me and asks if I want to go to the Wild game.

“What time do we have to leave?”
“Uhh..Right now.”

So I ditched my sister and Buddy the Elf, changed my clothes and had some fun at the hockey game. It’s too bad we lost.

Ah, well, I know they can do better next time. Go, Wild!

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Hi guys. How’s it going? Guess what? I got my hair colored today. Just thought y’all would like to know what’s going on in my little world.

There’s a question that’s been burning in my mind for a week or two, and I’d like to know what you guys think.

What (or who) should I be for Halloween? I’ve had a couple of suggestions already, like Cleopatra or a hockey player (so’s I can whack people who don’t behave with my hockey stick). Those are pretty good ideas, but I want to know what else you would come up with. And no, don’t tell me to go as myself because I’m scary enough, or you’re going the right way for a finger-wag.

Here’s a super-interesting useless fact about me: I’ve never been trick-or-treating. Nope, never. Every Halloween our church has a big party with games and candy and costume contests and candy and prizes. And candy. They call it “Hallelujah Night”, and that’s where I went every year. It’s super fun!

There’s usually a theme for the costumes, and then whoever has the best one wins. One year the theme was “the farm”, and my cousin dressed up as a milking machine. She wrote “Acme Milking Machine” on a white shirt and wore a hard hat that had “milking” tubes coming out of the top. Her costume was so awesome! Everyone thought she should have won, except the judges who chose a little girl who was “Princess Kay of the Milky Way”. C’mon! She didn’t think of that herself! She was only like seven! Whatever- we’re over it.

What is everyone else going to be?

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Tonight at dinner, my dad started singing a song to the tune of “Was a farmer, had a dog, and Bingo was his name-o”. Tortellini almost came out of my nose. That, apparently, was his objective. You sicko.

………

………

In other news, my dad has informed me that I’ve been generating controversy on this blog for a bit over a year now. I can look at this two ways:

It’s been a year already??

or

It’s only been a year?

There have been some darn good times here. I have come to think of the MOB as kind of my extended family, complete with older brothers* (like Kevi-Wevi, Andy and Benny-Wenny), the ‘Volunteer Maternal Protector’ (Cathy in the Wright) who helps me keep them in line, and the weird uncle (Strommy).

I always have fun at MOB events. Would it be really sad if I said they were the highlight of my social season? It would? Ok, never mind…

And to all of my faithful public, where would I be without you? I’ve written about some interesting things that have happened to me this past year, and I’ve posted dumb things that I made up on the spot, and you guys stuck around through it all! How do you do it? Seriously?

*Sniff*…Hold on, I’ve got something in my eye…*sniff*

*That occasionally drive me crazy, like big brothers have a tendency to do…I’m told.

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Yes, it’s that beautiful time of year; with leaves changing colors and the air getting colder*…

Time to break out the wrist sweaters!

This is the very last of the 899 pictures we took in Europe. We were at the airport to go home, and my carry-on luggage was so stuffed that I couldn’t fit my wrist sweaters anywhere, so I had to wear them.

*The air is supposed to be getting colder, right? Though I personally am not opposed to 70 and 80 degree weather for fall…
My mom and I support global warming!

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Alright, I’ve heard that some people have been clamoring for a post from their elusive Diva, so here I am. Bruise-free, might I add.

But this is a special post, as it is about a special person. I would not be here if she hadn’t been here first. It’s my mom. (Insert your “awwwww”s here)

It was her birthday on Friday. Earlier in the year I asked her what she wanted to do for it, and she said “Nothing, and no flamingo’s!”.

So I threw her a surprise party. Actually it was me and our home church group that meets on Friday nights.

A couple of weeks ago, my parents went on a little golfing vacation weekend thingy (yes, I did use both “golfing” and “vacation” in the same sentence, and no, I’m not crazy). So that Friday night we decided to plan the party and got all the invitations out on Sunday, which I thought was pretty slick.

The usual Home church schedule is everyone one comes around 7p.m. and just walk in, then we do a couple songs. We had our guests walk in around 7:15. The house was packed and my mother thoroughly surprised.

Direct quote from my Aunt Carol (HI CAROL!),”I’ve never been to a birthday party that broke down into a dance party.” Which it did. Even ask Benny.

Thank you to everyone who came and would happen to be reading this! I swear that her party was better than mine.

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I have a statement to make about my first paintball excursion:

Aahh-hooooooooouuuuuuuuuucccchhhhhhhh…….

Paintball: One of the funnest ways to get hurt!

Seriously, though; I had so much fun, and I think that I did pretty well for my first time. Kevi separated the Princess and I, probably because he thought our team would have an unfair advantage over the other. We both came away with some battle wounds to show off and war stories to tell (and/or embellish).

Kevin was the captain, and Foot was a fellow rookie, and mostly thanks to Benny, I never had to be the first one out! One game I was actually the last person left on my team, and then we lost because I ran out of ammo. Nice, huh?

I had gotten up at four that morning to do hair for a wedding, and towards the end of the tournament, I was pretty much just a trigger-happy zombie. I slept really well that night. Harder was trying to get out of bed the next morning. Is anyone else still itchy from those stupid burrs?

Anyway, I can’t wait to do it again next year, but in the meantime I think we should have a MOB Sock Wars tournament.

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We made an appearance at the MOB party, my father, mother and I. We brought along a member of my (very) extended family for her debut into MOB society (such as it is). Yes, Princess Flickerfeather came, saw, and even claims she had fun! Yay! I’m going to bring her along to trivia some time, I’m sure she’ll kick butt.

We had oodles of fun hanging out with our old peeps like Surly Dave and his Sweeter Half, Stromy and Margaret, and Benny; and I got to meet some new people: Cathy from Cake Eater Chronicles (she’s new to me, anyway), King David and Mocha-momma from the Far Wright (and yes, that name will follow you wherever you go), Andy from Echo Zoe, and one Joe Tucci.

At one point the Princess and I were sitting outside and a guy walks up and says “Hey, Mall Diva! Isn’t it creepy how I’ve been reading your blog all summer and know everything about you, but you don’t know who I am?” I replied that yes, that was creepy and inquired who he was. It was kind of…interesting… to meet Drjonz.

I was sad that Cathy in the Wright didn’t make it, but I guess she was up to her own shenanigans.

All in all, we had a good time.

(You missed out, Kevi.)

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