Thanks for the meme, Kevin. Don’t you have anyone better to tag?

Sitcoms? I don’t watch TV. No, not because my dad hogs it, I just fell out of the habit when I was in Beauty School. I didn’t have time, and when I did, there were better things to do than flip through 1000 channels and say “there’s nothing on!”

My life is sooooo much cooler than any sitcom character’s, anyway. I can’t think of any that I would want to be, so I’ll let the people who still check out blogs (even though its Summer) pick some out for me.

I reject your meme, and substitute my own!

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Kevin the meanie tagged me with a meme.

1: Black and White or Color; how do you prefer your movies?
Colorful.

2: What is the one single subject that bores you to near-death?
Listening to discussions about wars in other countries.

3: MP3s, CDs, Tapes or Records: what is your favorite medium for prerecorded music?
CDs. And vinyls so I can kick it old-school.

4: You are handed one first class trip plane ticket to anywhere in the world and ten million dollars cash. All of this is yours provided that you leave and not tell anyone where you are going … Ever. This includes family, friends, everyone. Would you take the money and ticket and run?
Heck yeah, I’d take it. I won’t tell them where I’m going, but once I get there, I’ll tell them where I am.
I’m so clever, I can’t even believe it! heeheehee!

5: Seriously, what do you consider the world’s most pressing issue now?

Well, since there are so many, I’ll pick one that doesn’t depress me too much:

So many people don’t know how to dress themselves.
…okay *sniff*, I promised myself I wouldn’t cry…

6: How would you rectify the world’s most pressing issue?

I’d give those people my personal shopper business card.

7: You are given the chance to go back and change one thing in your life; what would that be?
Can I bank this one for later when I’m older?

8: You are given the chance to go back and change one event in world history, what would that be?
Adam screwing it all up for the rest of us.

9: A night at the opera, or a night at the Grand Ole’ Opry –Which do you choose?
I don’t know. Both would be good places to see and be seen! (I am the Diva, after all.)

10: What is the one great unsolved crime of all time you’d like to solve?
The question to the answer of life, the universe, and everything, i.e. 42. Even though that’s not a crime. Oh, well.

11: One famous author can come to dinner with you. Who would that be, and what would you serve for the meal?
Lileks!

I’d serve lunchables and Hi-C.

12: You discover that John Lennon was right, that there is no hell below us, and above us there is only sky — what’s the first immoral thing you might do to celebrate this fact?
I’d move out of my parents’ house, smoke a pack of cigarettes, get a tattoo and have my belly-button pierced aaand….

I’d make Kevin buy me two beers.

Bonus! Random act of the week: I counted all of my shoes and the census came in … 33 pairs! (Can you guess who my role model is?)

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I know everyone’s been wondering if they are as hip as I am; well now you can find out! Here’s the Strib “hip” meme, by way of Margaret.

Where do you live?
The hippest burg in the Twin Cities: South St. Paul! The long-time (and I mean long time) residents of our neighborhood know our house as the “dreamhouse”, because it was built to promote a movie starring Cary Grant and Myrna Loy called “Mr. Blandings Builds His Dreamhouse”.

With whom?
The Reverend Mother, my daddy, the small red one, Felix, Piggy-wiggy and Birdy-wirdy.

What’s your coffeehouse/coffeeshop?
Any uber-funky establishment in the St. Paul/Minneapolis area.

What’s your Sunday breakfast spot?
On the “big, comfy chair” in my parents’ room.

What sites do you surf for news?
…”I get the news I need on the weather report”…

Actually, usually from these blogs, which may give you a clue as to how warped I might be.

What’s the first thing you read in the Strib?
The comics.

What’s on your morning drive dial?
Drive105, the Cities, or K102. Yes! I do listen to country, okay!

When not in town, where are you?
Far, far away.

Who’s your local band/musician?
Me!

Where do you have season tickets?
Oh, I don’t have any, I just mooch off get invited along by people who do.

What’s your apparel store(s)?
Forever 21, American Eagle, pretty much the whole mall.

Where’s your favorite “go to” place that always seems to have just the right thing?
That would be Forever 21.

Where do you get take-out?
Peking Cafe.

What’s your bakery?
My kitchen.

Where do you mall?
America’s mall.

What do you drive?
If this doesn’t make me hip, I don’t know what does:

I drive a 93 Mercury Grand Marquis, also known as my:
old-folks car,
boat,
land-yacht,
tank.

Where are you on a Friday night?
That depends…

Where’s your gallery(s)?
My room.

Who cuts your hair? Where?
A friend I went to school with, at EQ Life.

What are you really uptight about?
Me? Uptight? Never.

What’s your substance of choice?
Chocolate.

What subjects are you a total geek over?
Who are you calling a geek?

Where do you refuel? (recharge? feed your soul?)
While playing my piano.

What’s your date night?
What date night?

What’s the most you’ve paid for a concert ticket?
Me, pay? What is this “pay” you speak of?

When you’re at your naughtiest, you…
Uhhh… I don’t know, ask my mom (and don’t tell my dad).

What’s your beauty/grooming thing?
Everything!

What’s your workout? Where?
Dance-Dance Revolution, in my basement.

Who (or what’s) the service provider you can’t live without?
Hmmm…I guess right now that would be Virgin Mobile.

What’s your favorite night?
Thursday or Friday night.

What’s the next performance you’ll attend?
I’m thinkin’ it’s going to be a dance by Uncle Ben.
The Half-time show won’t even come close to that.

What’s an arts organization you support?
My own art, I don’t have an organization yet.

What’s your nightcap?
Anything I can get my hands on.

Where’s the afterparty?
In my mind.

What’s your favorite restaurant for:
• food?
How can…

• quality?
…I pick?

• late night?
Taco Bell.

• scene?
Cafe Latte.

• impress your date?
My mom says, White Castle.

• impress your client?
I don’t know, I’ll have to ask her.

Who’s your favorite Twin Citian?
Nick Coleman, because he brings so much joy (and material) to the rest of the MOB.

Hear me now – X will be Y in 6 months. . .
Boho will be ‘so last season’ in 6 months, thank God!

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I saw this on the EckerNet (who got it from Kathy the Cake Eater) and couldn’t resist.

The Average American?
The Average American meets a number of criteria. Let’s see how I measure up.

Eats peanut butter at least once a week.
Heck no! Peanut butter is nasty!

Prefers smooth peanut butter over chunky.
Ok, if I have to eat peanut butter, it has to be chunky. I’m serious.

Can name all Three Stooges
Moe, Curly, and … that other one.

Lives within a 20-minute drive of a Wal-Mart.
Question: Does anyone not live within twenty minutes of a Walmart?

Eats at McDonald’s at least once a year.
Only if the alternative is starvation. Have you seen “Supersize Me”?

Takes a shower for approximately 10.4 minutes a day.
No comment.

Never sings in the shower.
I think that this question is wrong. It should be:
Never admits to singing in the shower.

Lives in a house, not an apartment or condominium. Has a home valued between $100,000 and $300,000
Yes, and no, respectively.

Has fired a gun.
Ooooohh, yeah.

Is between 5 feet and 6 feet tall.
Duh

Weighs 135 to 205.
Not even soaking wet, with my gun, in my boot.

Is between the ages of 18 and 53.
Haha!! Just shy.

Believes gambling is an acceptable entertainment option.
Actually, I think it’s really lame, though I do play poker with Starburst wrappers.

Grew up within 50 miles of current home.
Not grown up yet, but more mature than many!

So, I guess I am the very un-average American.
That’s fine with me. I’ve always known I was different.

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