by the Night Writer
In his never-ending vigilance and quest for news of animal jihad threats, KingDavid (and believe me, you want men like him on that wall), citing an article on Fox, warns of an emerging threat; pythons, right here in America:
The fast-growing population of snakes has been invading southern Florida’s ecosystem since 1992, when scientists speculate a bevy of Burmese pythons was released into the wild after Hurricane Andrew shattered many pet shop terrariums.
While we’re likely a long way yet from Snakes on the Plains, if gangs of pythons start becoming common we’ll need a better way to refer to a collective of them than “bevy”, which is commonly used to describe quail. Think of it, Python-Quail really don’t go together. If we were to borrow a term from the bird kingdom then crows — as in “a murder of crows” — might be a better choice. A “murder of pythons” certainly has a more sinister ring, but it doesn’t quite trip off the tongue.
I consulted Fun With Words to review how animal collectives are described to get some clues on how we might approach this for large snakes that bite and choke (you, not themselves). Some collectives are alliterative, e.g., an army of ants, a horde of hamsters, a lounge of lizards. Others use descriptors referring to characteristics of the animals in question, ala a prickle of hedgehogs, a sneak of weasels or an exaltation of larks. Others are both alliterative and descriptive, e.g., a glint of goldfish, a scurry of squirrels or a dunce of democrats.
Okay, I made that last one up. But since I’m feeling creative today here is my top-ten list of possible names for a python collective; let me know your favorite or if you have other suggestions. If we come to a consensus I’ll forward the results onto the Department of Homeland Security. This last part should be pretty easy; I’m sure I saw Janet Napolitano nervously checking out the bumper of my truck just the other day. Anyway, here are my suggestions:
- A passel of pythons
- A pod of pythons
- A pounce of pythons
- A clutch of pythons
- A hiss of pythons
- A strike of pythons
- A squeeze of pythons
- A plague of pythons
- A temptation of pythons (getting biblical)
- A boot of pythons (turning the tables on them)
Oh, wait … I can go to eleven! Here’s my favorite: A monty of pythons!
No doubt #11 is the best; however, I do believe going with a ‘full monty’ of pythons might be even better.
I think so too, KD, but I had to leave something for the commenters!
You are a genius.
And I’m all yours!
A ‘clutch of pythons’ seems very egg oriented for some reason. Like a clutch of python eggs seems good to me! Otherwise, I vote passel or plague.
quail are covies, not bevies.
sorry, i just had to correct that.
oh, yeah, my vote…
i vote that NW thought up #11 before he even had post about it.
Gino, I’m sure you are right. That’s the way his mind works.
Gino, both “bevy” and “covey” are recognized by my source as descriptions for quail. I grew up with “covey”, but viva diversity! 😉
It also seems to me that more than a few NL pithers quailed when facing Willie McCovey, fwiw.
I do believe that the Rev. Mother was referring to me in her initial comment.
Sorry, KD. I think you’re great, but my husband is the genius. A monty of pythons. It’s priceless.
A bag of groceries!
Oh yeah, we’re talking about pythons…
Or maybe “a kook of nuts”, Diva.
I’m glad there’s at least one genius in our bunch, because soon enough, once global warming turns MN into a tropical climate, those pythons will find there way up here for sure, and the battle will be on. The scenario I envision is that we humans will have to lie in bed with our current nemesis, the squirrel, to eradicate the threat caused by pythons. It’s the old my enemy’s enemy is my friend type situation.
By all means, we will need to “befriend” the squirrel, feeding him sweets and fattening tidbits to make him plump and slow and encouraing even more breeding…all so the pythons will be too full on squirrels to go after Milo or the kids.
well, not milo, at least.
cats do have value, after all.