My painful life

It’s just not easy being me. Here’s the dealio:

Last weekend my parents had some golfing buddies over to play cards, and I got to play too! Somehow the talk turned to icky things that make me want to yell, “Go get a secret, secluded room!!!” I’ll just give you one line, and leave it to your imaginations: “Oooh! Is that Latex?” *Tiger Lilly sobbing in the backround.* Why me?

After that, the talk turned to celebrities. Mainly, how stupid it is that all the TV talks about is Anna Nicole Smith and Britney. Zzzz… I’m sorry, how stupid is it to talk about how stupid the TV is? I just don’t an attention span for that. To be fair, there was good stuff, too. We had Chocolate Turtle Cake! *Hallelujuah Angel chorus in the backround.*

Then, last Tuesday I had double Tae Kwon Do. The first class was the normal one: running, hitting, kicking, sparring, practicing forms. The second class was the Special Martial Arts Training Program (SMATP). No, that doesn’t describe the sound we often make, and it’s not ‘special’ as in mental, but special as in WEAPONS!!! (No, Kevin, not guns.)

There are only three people in the SMATP because the test to get in is really hard. But one of our people has not shown up for about 5 weeks. He has Bronchitis. ANYWAY, in the second class I practiced my sweet Boe Staff formation. Then I got to throw the other student. Who is 16. And is a black belt. But Master Yu decreed it, and it’s best not to upset Master Yu (sixth degree black belt and all that). There are actually a few techniques to throwing people, and most of them involve your shoulder. Somehow I strained my thigh muscles. We were training for the demonstration that we have to do at the promotion test next Saturday. Yep, that’s right, I’m on a Demo Team!

Ciao for now, peeps!

17 thoughts on “My painful life

  1. Yup, your life sounds really….uh, awful.

    Although I will agree that the whole not allowing you to just shoot your opponent is pretty sad. Shame on Master Yu.

    Sixth degree? Bah, I see your Master Yu and raise you one Chuck Norris. I win.

  2. No, Dan, not balloons. And don’t listen to my father. Why would I say ‘Go find a secret room’ if we were talking about painting?

  3. As half of the golf partners in question I do feel the need to point out to TL that one of the risks of playing cards with adults (especially me) is that we may stray ever so briefly into the PG-13 world on occassion. The truth is your just jealous that MD and I teamed up to school you in sequence…..

  4. Only PG-13?? Sounds like a boring card game.

    pwn3d is leet speak (or as they type it l33t speak). Basically, computer nerds decided they needed their own “secret language” to show how cool they are and so they started mispelling words and putting numbers in it.

    Unfortunately, it caught on and as a result you have kids talking about pokemon (or whatever is cool right now) using random letters that apparently means something.

    pwn3d is leetspeak for “owned” I think.

  5. In case it wasn’t clear in my last comment, I hate leetspeak. I want to punch whoever invented it in the liver.

  6. I am 13 years old, so I think that conversation was rated PG-M (only to be talked about when ONLY married couples are in the room).

    It’s not like I care about you winning the Sequence game. After all, I can still pwn you into the dust at Tae Kwon Do, remember?

  7. TL, you may know Tae Kwon Do, but never underestimate the treachery of “old” people. We dont need martial arts to pwn.

  8. Oh? What are you going to do, call me whippersnapper? I’ve never known a treacherous ‘old’ person.

  9. Never known a treacherous old person? That’s because they’re always sneaky. They p3wn you so sneakily that you’ll ask yourself if you’ve been p3wned. Chances are that you have been.

  10. ??? How would I have been p3wned? Nothing missing, nothing hurts unless I get kicked in Tae Kwon Do, and I’m not heartbroken. Those would be p3wning categories for me.

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