Opening a Can…

Tonight my dad and I went to Keegan’s, had some fun and sucked at trivia, along with Uncle Ben and a newby who called himself Randy. There was much drinking, socializing, and yelling at Marty for daring to tell us our short-bus answers were wrong. Something was missing, though…what was it?

Oh, yeah!

Kevin! Afraid to show your face, were you? After all the: “this is what happens when you skip Keegan’s” crap that you tried to pull? I’m there more often than you are! Uncle Ben felt some wrath, but of course he blamed it on you.

“Kevin started it!”

Well, in the famous words of Manny the Wooly Mammoth,:

“I don’t care who started it, I’m gonna finish it!”

‘Nuff said.

20 thoughts on “Opening a Can…

  1. In my defense your father should know that I only show up every other week. So if you want to yell at me in person you’re gonna have to show up next week…if you dare!

    In any case, I accept your challenge…whatever that means.

  2. Heh. Remember, this isn’t just my daughter you’re trifling with but Cathy’s personal shopper as well!

    And you might want to ask Strommie what I meted out to him when he pursued a similar quest.

  3. Okay, I’ll bite. What did you mete out to Strommie when he did the same sicko thing?

    BTW, do you think Kevin could work up the courage?

  4. Young Jedi…you so much as BREATHE on the Mall Diva, and her dad can stomp on whatever remains are left after I get done with you.

    Uncle Ben…stop playing the instigator. Or you’re next after I’m done with Kevin!

  5. As any good Norwegian would say: “uff da!” Kevin, lay off. Cathy is stronger and more dangerous than you. Surely I’ll be locking my doors for fear of maternal rage.

    Mall Diva, what is this about a dance-off? Surely you don’t expect Kevin and I to dance the waltz together. I think the better option would be to watch your happily married parents grace your home with the cha-cha. I have some Herb Alpert if they need it.

  6. I don’t dance…unless on fire.

    And how did I get volunteered for such debauchery? Now I got the whole Stewart clan after me. Plus I know it’s a fact that every father is issued a 12-gauge shotgun when their first daughter is born. Just because he doesn’t display it over his front door doesn’t mean it’s not hiding in a lampshade or something.

    And Cathy, you can’t really make threats since you never show up at Keegans! It might even be worth getting my behind kicked just to make you come down to Keegans once a month.

  7. Sounds like you’re dancing pretty good right now, man.

    But, hey! Let’s make it a reunion! It’ll be fun as long as no one comes too near me.

    Haven’t you guys ever heard of Dance-Dance Revolution?

  8. I haven’t shown up at Keegan’s lately. But I WILL for a good cause. And I most definitely consider polishing the floor with your behind a good cause.

    Can you tell I sort of miss ya?

  9. Dance Dance Revolution?? Nope, then again anything with “Dance Dance” in the title isn’t likely to grab my attention.

    Cathy : Aaaaahhhh, sort of miss me huh? Tell you what. You show up at Keegans and I’ll let you take one swing at me for free. After that Learned Foot has got my back.

  10. I wouldn’t recommend polishing the floor with Kevin’s behind. You don’t want to get Keegan’s in trouble with the Health Department. But if there’s going to be a brawl let me know so that I can bring my camera. Maybe the Mall Diva will give him a peck on the cheek as he lays prostrate in his hospital bed?

    Kevin, don’t count on Foot. He’s a lawyer.

  11. Kevin (and the Sirius Cybernetics Marketing Dept.) will be the first up against the wall when the Dance-Dance Revolution comes.

    I think this is the first time on my blog when the word count in Comments has exceeded the original post!

  12. That’s because the prospect of a knock down, drag out fight is so much fun. Your wall comment reminded me of a Radiohead lyric, “When I am king you will be first against the wall.” Substitute Queen for King and we’ve got game!

    Mall Diva, I trust that you are taking this with good humour? My hair is growing daily and I wouldn’t want you to stab me when you give me that haircut.

  13. Don’t worry, I started this spat.

    I wouldn’t cut you, for I am ever the professional. Well, at least not purposefully…

  14. Hi! I am a friend of MallDiva and she asked me to comment or something of the like. So here it is: my comment.

    Dance Dance Revolution rocks!

  15. Ok first I was apparently challenged by MD (the actual challenge is still unclear). Then I was dared to kiss her. Then I apparently declared war on the Dance-Dance Revolution…whatever that is??

    I feel like a marionette. What’s next for me?

    MD : Professionalism is no fun. Stab him.

    Jeff : Apparently I’m being sacrificed on the alter of MD, by the high priestess Cathy. How’s your day going?

    Princess FlickerFeather : Ok now we you’re lying. MD doesn’t have friends. You’re just a figment of our imaginations. Although in retrospect I probably met you at her grad party. Dang it…I hate reality.

    I reject your reality, and substitute my own.

  16. Kevin! I would never stab you or have you sacrificed! I’m just saying that I would whoop you in a dance-off.

    Ok, don’t listen to Uncle Ben, he’s just going to get you into trouble…. I mean more trouble.

    And just so you kmow, I have lots of friends. Watch your back.

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