The Mall Diva’s treatise on gun safety a few days ago reminded me of when we took a DNR gun safety class together five years ago, and of our subsequent trips to the shooting range after she was certified.

Her first time with live ammunition she was 50 feet away and put her first shot in the upper left corner of the target – and her next four shots tightly in the black. I wasn’t too surprised because she seems to pick things up pretty naturally.

For example, when she was the same age as the firearm training she also wanted to learn how to throw and catch a football. She has good coordination and picked that up pretty fast, so we moved on to trying to catch the ball while on the run. On about her third “catch” or so the ball hit her hands…and then bounced into her nose. Oh, the agony and gnashing of teeth.

The indoor shooting range we were going to also had handguns for rent, and my daughter soon laid eyes on a Desert Eagle, a .50 caliber handgun that her instructor had talked about a couple of times and had even brought to class once. She wanted to shoot the Eagle. This may or may not have had to do with the time we were plinking with a .22 rifle at the same range and a couple of guys had shown up in the stall next to us with a .44 caliber pistol. Even with ear protection we could feel the concussion from each shot and the vibration through the cement floor and up through our feet. So then we’re at the counter and she’s saying, “Dad, let’s get the Eagle!”

“My child,” I said, “think ‘football and nose.’ Think ‘football times about 50.’ Think that maybe a gun that can stop a rhino can also lead to rhinoplasty.”

“Cool. So are we getting it?”

I could answer that, but I think I’ll just let the boys out there keep guessing for awhile.

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