by the Night Writer

It’s been a week of distractions; you know, that thing called life. Big doings at work, new things at home and, oh yeah, my computer hard-drive died, my land-line went on the fritz and as part of that my DSL connection started working (or not working) sporadically. So. Got a new hard-drive (and more RAM while I was at it) for the PC, spent three days trying to get Qwest to come out and then just about every night this week I’ve been loading the hard-drive with a new operating system and Office suite, re-loading Norton, recovering files (including more than 1,000 iTunes songs) and so it’s been hard to concentrate enough to write about some of the big ideas I’ve got stirring in my head. Maybe next week. But since “life” has intruded this week, I might as well pick up on the “life missions accomplished” meme that is going around. The process here is bold-face the things you’ve done; my accompanying commentary is in italics. Oh, and there’s a little video surprise for you as well toward the end.

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink. No, but I once bought ice cream for the entire girl’s softball team I was coaching.
02. Swam with wild dolphins.
03. Climbed a mountain. No, but I walked to the top of Arthur’s Seat in Edinburgh and Squaw Peak in Phoenix, but those are just big, rocky hills.
04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive.
05. Been inside the Great Pyramid.
06. Held a tarantula.
07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone. In a jacuzzi, and there was a fireplace nearby, too.
08. Said ‘I love you’ and meant it. Still do.
09. Hugged a tree. No, but I’ve bounced off a couple in my time.
10. Bungee jumped.
11. Visited Paris. I was there for my 21st birthday, in fact.
12. Watched a lightning storm at sea.
13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise. Many a time, but not so much lately.
14. Seen the Northern Lights.
15. Gone to a huge sports game. Actually got paid to work the Super Bowl, two World Series games and an All-Star game at the Metrodome.
16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa. I was there, but thought I might be the last amount of weight needed to tip it over completely so I didn’t climb.
17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables. Yeah, but I still didn’t like them. Maybe I shouldn’t have given them names.
18. Touched an iceberg.
19. Slept under the stars. And woke up with a horse pawing at me with its hoof.
20. Changed a baby’s diaper.
21. Taken a trip on a hot air balloon.
22. Watched a meteor shower.
23. Got drunk on champagne. Ah, Paris.
24. Given more than you can afford to charity. My philosophy is that this is almost impossible.
25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope.
26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment.
27. Had a food fight.
28. Bet on a winning horse.
29. Asked out a stranger. Strangely enough, she said no.
30. Had a snowball fight. And let’s not dredge up that accident with the car.
31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can.
32. Held a lamb.
33. Seen a total eclipse. Oh great, there goes that ear-worm again.
34. Ridden a roller coaster.
35. Hit a home run. Softball.
36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking. Yes the first part, no to the second.
37. Adopted an accent for an entire day. How about for the whole last month I was England?
38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment.
39. Had two hard drives for your computer. Sure, I’ve got two right now. Of course, one doesn’t work (see above).
40. Visited all 50 states. No, but I think I’m up to 37.
41. Taken care of someone who was s**tfaced. I quit counting a long time ago.
42. Had amazing friends.
43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country.
44. Watched wild whales.
45. Stolen a sign.
46. Backpacked in Europe. Well, I did carry a backpack around in Spain this summer, but I don’t think that’s what they mean.
47. Taken a road-trip.
48. Gone rock climbing.
49. Midnight walk on the beach.
50. Gone sky diving.
51. Visited Ireland. And England, Scotland, Italy, France and Spain.
52. Been heartbroken for longer than when you were in love. No, but it was close.
53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them. It’s not that uncommon in Europe.
54. Visited Japan.
55. Milked a cow.
56. Alphabetized your cds.
57. Pretended to be a superhero. One year my aunt sewed Superman pajamas for my brother, my cousins and I, with a reinforced “S” patch to stop bullets.
58. Sung karaoke.
59. Lounged around in bed all day.
60. Posed nude in front of strangers.
61. Gone scuba diving.
62. Kissed in the rain.
63. Played in the mud.
64. Played in the rain.
65. Gone to a drive-in theater. It might even have been rainy and muddy.
66. Visited the Great Wall of China.
67. Started a business.
68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken. Looking good so far.
69. Toured ancient sites.
70. Taken a martial arts class. But I’ve taken Tiger Lilly to a number of them.
71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight.
72. Gotten married.
73. Been in a movie.
74. Crashed a party.
75. Gotten divorced.
76. Gone without food for 5 days. I’ve gone 3 days several times, though. Deliberately.
77. Made cookies from scratch.
78. Won first prize in a costume contest.
79. Ridden a gondola in Venice.
80. Gotten a tattoo.
81. Rafted the Snake River.
82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”.
83. Got flowers for no reason. Given, not received, anyway.
84. Performed on stage.
85. Been to Las Vegas. My advice: don’t risk more than you can afford to lose, whether it’s money, your life or your marriage.
86. Recorded music.
87. Eaten shark. Grilled, with tarragon. Mmmm.
88. Had a one-night stand. Yeah, but it lasted a week.
89. Gone to Thailand.
90. Bought a house. A few times.
91. Been in a combat zone.
92. Buried one/both of your parents.
93. Been on a cruise ship.
94. Spoken more than one language fluently.
95. Performed in Rocky Horror.
96. Live in a foreign country, even for a brief time. One semester in England.
97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour. I will when the Mall Diva starts her tour, though.
98. Created and named your own constellation of stars.
99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country.
100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over.
101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge.
102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking.
103. Had plastic surgery.
104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived. Got out untouched because people were praying for me.
105. Wrote articles for a large publication. But for other people’s by-lines.
106. Lost over 100 pounds.
107. Held someone while they were having a flashback.
108. Piloted an airplane.
109. Petted a stingray. I would have scratched behind its ears but I couldn’t find them.
110. Broken someone’s heart. Unfortunately. I’m not proud of it.
111. Helped an animal give birth.
112. Won money on a T.V. game show.
113. Broken a bone. Only a little one.
114. Gone on an African photo safari.
115. Had a body part of yours below the neck pierced.
116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol. All three, but not at once.
117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild. Had a roommate once who was an avid Morel hunter.
118. Ridden a horse. But not well. We were both relieved when it was over.
119. Had major surgery.
120. Had a snake as a pet.
121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon.
122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours. .
123. Visited non-US foreign countries.
124. Visited all 7 continents.
125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days.
126. Eaten kangaroo meat.
127. Eaten sushi.

128. Had your picture in the newspaper.
129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about.
130. Gone back to school.
131. Parasailed.
132. Petted a cockroach.
133. Eaten fried green tomatoes. Once.
134. Read The Iliad. Twice.
135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school.
136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating. Fish, and a couple of quail.
137. Skipped all your school reunions. Never been to one for high school or college.
138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language.
139. Been elected to public office.
140. Written your own computer language.
141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream.
142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care.
143. Built your own PC from parts.
144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you.
145. Had a booth at a street fair.
146: Dyed your hair.
147: Been a DJ.
148: Shaved your head.
149: Caused a car accident.
150: Saved someone’s life. Do souls count?

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